Going through a divorce can be one of the most difficult times in a person’s life. When emotions are running high, it can be tough to see a clear path forward. Divorces can be complicated on their own, but when you add a high-conflict personality into the mix, things can become even more challenging. In New Jersey, complex divorces often involve one or both parties who have difficulty cooperating or communicating peacefully. If you are dealing with this type of situation, it’s important to understand what you’re facing and how to best handle it. At, Tanya L. Freeman, Attorney at Law , we are here to guide you through the legal process and help you navigate the complexities of your case.
What Is a High-Conflict Personality?
A high-conflict personality is someone who tends to argue a lot, blame others, and create a lot of drama. They often don’t take responsibility for their actions and are quick to accuse their partner of wrongdoings. High-conflict personalities may struggle with emotional regulation, meaning they can go from calm to angry in a matter of seconds. They may not handle disagreements in a reasonable way, and instead, blow up small issues into major problems. This makes it hard for both spouses to work together to reach a fair and peaceful resolution.
In New Jersey, when divorces involve high-conflict personalities, they can quickly turn into long and drawn-out battles. Instead of finding common ground, one spouse might try to fight at every turn, making the divorce process even more painful. It’s important to remember that people with high-conflict personalities may not change their behavior during the divorce, no matter how much you hope they will. Understanding this can help you prepare for what’s to come.
Why Complex Divorces Can Be So Challenging
A complex divorce is more than just a legal separation. It often involves issues like property division, child custody, alimony, and other financial matters that are not easy to resolve. When high-conflict personalities are involved, these already tough decisions can become even more stressful. The spouse with the high-conflict personality may not want to cooperate in any way, causing delays and making it hard to reach a fair settlement.
New Jersey law requires that couples make decisions that are in the best interest of any children involved, but a high-conflict spouse might not see things that way. Instead of focusing on what’s best for the children, they might focus on “winning” the divorce. This means they might fight harder for custody or visitation rights just to hurt the other spouse, not because it’s truly what’s best for the kids.
More than an accomplished divorce and family law attorney, Tanya L. Freeman, is a consummate professional with a wealth of corporate and life experience. Known as a leader and strategist, Tanya L. Freeman was appointed by the Governor of New Jersey as Chair of the Board of Directors of the University Hospital in Newark, New Jersey. Tanya L. Freeman also presents among the ranks of public speakers. She captivates and inspires professional groups nationwide. "Tanya has the eloquence and oratory brilliance with the ability to forge deep connections with her listeners."
Tanya L. Freeman, Attorney at Law
Managing Partner of the Family Law Practice at Callagy Law
Financial matters can also become more difficult when dealing with high-conflict personalities. Instead of negotiating fairly, one spouse may try to hide assets, spend money carelessly, or refuse to pay agreed-upon support. This can create more legal battles and force the other spouse to take additional steps to protect themselves and their children financially.
How to Protect Yourself During a High-Conflict Divorce
Dealing with a high-conflict personality can be exhausting and emotionally draining. In New Jersey, it’s important to take steps to protect yourself both legally and emotionally. One of the first things to do is to stay calm and focused. While the other spouse might try to create chaos and drama, you can remain calm and work with your lawyer to find solutions. Staying composed will help you make better decisions and show the court that you are focused on reaching a fair resolution.
Another key part of protecting yourself during a high-conflict divorce is documenting everything. If your spouse has a pattern of bad behavior, such as refusing to follow court orders or making threats, it’s important to keep a record of these incidents. These records can be helpful in court and can show a judge the true nature of the situation. It’s also a good idea to keep communication with your spouse in writing whenever possible. Emails and text messages can provide proof of what was said, and they can help avoid the “he said, she said” arguments that often arise in these types of divorces.
Having the right legal support is crucial when dealing with a high-conflict personality in a divorce. In New Jersey, laws can be complex, and it’s important to work with an attorney who understands how to handle these kinds of cases. A lawyer can help you navigate the legal system, protect your rights, and make sure that your spouse’s behavior doesn’t unfairly impact the outcome of the divorce. Your lawyer will also be able to help you avoid unnecessary conflicts and focus on what’s most important, like the well-being of your children and your financial future.
I was very fortunate to find Tanya online during an urgent family matter. I was able to speak with her on our situation and she immediately jumped on the case the same day. I was impressed at her knowledge and her team as they were able to answer questions on the spot and navigate through an unpleasant situation. Her honesty and responsiveness have made this process much easier, and the support she has provided has truly gone above my expectation of a family law firm. This is truly an exceptional firm & I would highly recommend.” - Lydia Martinez My father recently hired Tanya Freeman; Family Law Attorney and her team as a replacement to handle his divorce which has been going nowhere for over 3 years with a different attorney. Tanya and her team have done so much within just a few months for his trial and has given my father a new sense of hope. The team is always quick to respond to any questions. The case is still ongoing, however, my father has newly restored confidence that he will be treated fairly and with his best interest in mind. We definitely recommend Tanya Freeman; Family Law Attorney." - Molly Howard Tanya is an outstanding attorney! Her attentiveness to detail and willingness to be honest with her clients means you’re going to get the best possible outcome for your case. She and her team went above and beyond, making sure my divorce and custody case ended neatly and in the best interest of my children. Her pricing is reasonable and she’s willing to work with you. I highly recommend Tanya Freeman to anyone going through a divorce or family law case!" - Jenifer Mckinney
Child Custody in High-Conflict Divorces
One of the biggest concerns in any divorce is how child custody will be handled. In New Jersey, the court makes decisions based on what is best for the children. However, when one spouse is a high-conflict personality, this can make the process more difficult. High-conflict personalities may try to use the children as a way to hurt the other spouse. They may refuse to cooperate with custody agreements or visitation schedules, making things harder on the children.
It’s important to remember that the court’s main goal is to protect the children’s best interests. When there is a high-conflict personality involved, the court will often look at their behavior and how it impacts the children. A judge may order a parenting evaluation or appoint a guardian ad litem to represent the children’s best interests. This can help provide an objective view of the situation and ensure that the high-conflict spouse’s behavior doesn’t harm the children.
As a parent, it’s important to stay focused on your children and what they need during this difficult time. Even though your spouse may try to stir up conflict, you can focus on creating a safe and stable environment for your kids. This will not only help them through the divorce, but it will also show the court that you are acting in their best interests.
Financial Issues in High-Conflict Divorces
Financial matters can become particularly complicated in a high-conflict divorce. In New Jersey, divorces often involve dividing assets, determining alimony, and setting up child support. When one spouse has a high-conflict personality, these issues can quickly become more complicated. For example, a high-conflict spouse may refuse to disclose all of their assets, making it difficult to reach a fair division of property.
If you suspect that your spouse is hiding assets or not being truthful about their finances, it’s important to take legal steps to protect yourself. Your lawyer can help you gather the necessary documentation and work with financial specialists to uncover any hidden assets. This can ensure that you receive your fair share of the marital property.
Alimony can also become a point of contention in high-conflict divorces. A high-conflict spouse may refuse to pay the agreed-upon support, or they may try to reduce the amount they owe by lying about their income. In these cases, it’s important to have legal support to enforce the alimony agreement and make sure that your spouse is held accountable.
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Why You Need a Strong Legal Team
Dealing with a high-conflict personality during a divorce can feel overwhelming, but you don’t have to go through it alone. In New Jersey, complex divorces involving high-conflict personalities require a strong legal team that understands how to handle these difficult situations. Having an attorney by your side can help you stay focused, protect your rights, and make sure that the divorce process is as smooth as possible. Your lawyer can help you navigate the legal system and provide you with the guidance you need to reach a fair resolution.
The key to handling a high-conflict divorce is staying calm and not allowing your spouse’s behavior to control the process. While it may be tempting to fight back or get emotional, it’s important to stay focused on the bigger picture. Your attorney can help you stay grounded and work through the legal challenges without getting drawn into unnecessary conflict.
Divorces are never easy, but when a high-conflict personality is involved, the process can become even more difficult. In New Jersey, complex divorces require careful planning and legal experience to ensure that your rights are protected and that a fair outcome is achieved. Whether you are dealing with issues of child custody, property division, or financial support, it’s important to have a lawyer who can guide you through the process and help you avoid unnecessary conflicts.
If you are going through a divorce in New Jersey and are dealing with a high-conflict personality, Tanya L. Freeman, Attorney at Law, is here to help. With the experience and knowledge needed to handle complex divorces, our firm will provide you with the legal support and guidance you need during this difficult time. Contact us today for a consultation and take the first step toward a brighter future.